Beyond Performance: Finding Joy in the Process

For a long time, I viewed painting through the lens of results and performance. But lately, I’ve felt a deep pull to return to a different place: the innocence of childhood.

I am currently on a path to reconnect with the pure experience of painting—where color is used for the simple pleasure of seeing it come alive on the page. I want to rediscover that state of mind where art isn’t a task, but a game. No pressure, no expectations of perfection, just the raw curiosity of a child discovering the world for the first time.

This new chapter is about getting closer to the raw materials. I want to feel the resistance of the heavy gels, the richness of the pigments, and the physical connection between my hand and the canvas. It’s a deliberate shift away from performance and toward presence.

I am exploring this dimension more and more each day, allowing myself the freedom to play, to experiment, and to simply be an artist in the most honest sense of the word.

These flowers were painted from photos I captured of daffodils during my time living in Amsterdam, and they hold a very special place in my heart. To bring this memory to life, I worked within my Stillman & Birn Beta Series Mixed Media sketchbook, using a palette of Golden Titanium White, Yellow Ochre, and Ultramarine Blue, along with Winsor & Newton Permanent Alizarin Crimson.